Okay, there have been a number of systems in the history of videogames that I could do without. You could have your Intellivision, your Sega Master System, even your Super Nintendo... I could live without those 3 for various reasons.
But is there that one system that you single out for complete hatred? One that you pick on a little bit? One that you dislike on an emotional level, even though you can't quite pinpoint the reason?
For me, that system is the Colecovision. Now before all you Colecovision fans (and there are a lot of you here) bombard me with flames and game recommendations, let me stop you right there...I've heard it all before. No one is turning me onto it. No one is bringing me over to the Coleco team. Better men have tried and failed.
When I try to put a reason to my feelings about the Colecovision, logic breaks down.
I don't like the controllers. Not a little bit. Yet, I wouldn't say they're the worst controllers ever made (I'm thinking about you, Intellivision, and you Atari 5200).
I don't like the games. Sorry, Venture is just not a marquee game. Neither is Zaxxon. But boy, that Donkey Kong looked pretty fierce back in '82.
Maybe it's the little intangible things. Like the way you just have to sit there and wait for a game to start up. Or how you have to choose the number of players and the difficulty from that stupid menu (on which the choice is invariably "1") Or the way the controller cords resemble phone cords from the seventies.
Or maybe it's that Colecovision attitude. You had to be there to know what I'm talking about. Just that superior attitude of those kids who asked their parents for Colecovisions instead of Ataris. And got them!
My friend Mike was the only kid on our block to get a Colecovision. He invited me over to play it. I was thrilled...to learn how much I hated it! It's like I WANTED to hate it!
"I've got news for you Mike; this sucks! Want to come over and try my Vectrex? I bought it for 50 dollars! Hey, is Coleco gonna come out with Berzerk? How about Pole Position? What's this game...Cosmic Avenger? Did that ever come out in the arcades? Hey Mike, let's watch Scooby Doo instead of play Colecovision, okay? Pitfall is better than Donkey Kong, by the way."
Ultimately, when I look at it in a rational way, Colecovision FAILS my "one worthwhile original game" test. Odyssey had KC Munchkin. Intellivision had AD&D. Atari 5200 had Robotron. To me, the CV just had NO GAME.
Anyone with a similiarly intense hatred of this or a different system, or am I alone in this? And DON'T SAY VECTREX!